I dreamed for years of my someday home, my forever home. I planned and made lists of what I’d have in my ultimate home. I visualized (as much as I can visualize) this home, and yes, throughout the years, the dreams changed and evolved. It was never about opulence or luxury. I never cared for fancy or high-end. It was never about expensive appliances or massive palace-like buildings. I look for quiet, simple comfort.
Learning to live alone had its difficulties. I knew it was going to be hard and there are times when the emotions and loneliness weigh heavy. I’ve reached that point within myself where it’s time to move on; time to go after that dream home. I waited for years for this. I gave up a lot of me and spent a long time building me back up and discovering who I really am. I changed, evolved, and finally found a lifestyle with which I am happy… except for that dream home.
But have I waited too long? I was in limbo for the past 20 plus years and I thought I was finally going to settle down in my dream house. My dreams, as simple as I thought they were, seem to be impossible to achieve. I am challenged in every direction and after reaching a point where I never thought I’d have to compromise on what I wanted, I feel I am falling into less and less of what I want.
I’m tired of waiting. I’m tired of living in limbo. I want to live my life; a life which was put on the back burner to get this house. Yep, I’m settling, but at the moment, it looks like I’m settling for less-than. Where are my dreams?
(This is where I am today in this emotional roller coaster in dealing with real estate.)
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