Friday, June 26, 2015
Art on the Back Burner
Art on the Back Burner… and falling off the stove
Many of you probably know I sold my house. I’ve not found a new place yet and the new owner is letting me stay here until the end of August. He started clearing up the yard. Yesterday he trimmed up trees out back and cut down all the shrubs along the back of the house - rhododendrons, azaleas, yews, etc. The house looks naked.
It is his house now and I have no say. It does look nice, but it’s a big change and I feel exposed sitting in front of the window. Where are the little birdies going to go? He’s also convincing me to throw stuff out, which, those of you who know me and knew my mother, know it’s hard for me. Yeah, in some aspects, I am my mother’s daughter.
I’m in a bit of a panic about finding a new home. I know what I want, but it’s looking like I can’t find it in the area I want. I love the Sunapee/Kearsarge region and want to stay in the InterTown Record reader area (for my job as editor). Plus, I do love it here and I have more friends now than ever before.
Then there’s the packing and the squeezing of 3,000 SF to under 1,000. My goal is to find a home under 1,000 SF. It’s a struggle because my art mind kicks in and I always think I can make something out of everything. I keep joking with friends that I need someone to go behind me and when I put something in a box, they could move it to a garbage bag. It’s hard for me because my mind jumps to how much something cost and to just throw it away feels so wrong. But I have to let go.
My art has taken a back seat with all this and I’ve always been one that if I am not drawing, taking photographs, writing, or painting, I start feeling like I’m losing my mind. I haven’t worked on my new book for months. I’ve got other stories to write and drawings to finish. But that can’t happen for awhile and I am sad.
Yes, my job allows me to write as I pick up stories and interviews (along with the editing and the community calendar and weekly column), but it’s not the same as writing my travel stories.
All the stress saps my energy. I’m so tired all the time. But I believe in miracles and a new home will come.