Pre-conceived Self Beliefs

The recent trip had a lot of ups and downs and I’m still trying to put it all together. What really happened on that trip? How has that trip changed my thinking for all other trips? For life? 

I’m finishing up the writing for Day 6 of the Wichita trip. That was my busiest, most sites visited day. Looking back on it, I can’t believe all I accomplished. I’m still overjoyed at walking the Old Chain of Rocks Bridge and the other amazing places I visited. In retrospect, I realize that, after putting most of my energy in the Chain of Rocks Bridge, I didn’t give the other places their due.

Why do I do that? (And I do this type of thing repeatedly).

It’s my own beliefs of myself that sometimes… I’m searching for the right way to describe this… sabotage how I experience subsequent instances. This is not just true about the latest journey, but it happens often -- with previous trips, with day excursions, and even shopping. Those pre-conceived self beliefs tell me I’m only good for one event/site visit per day, that I can only do one “big” thing a day which means everything else is… less than, done with little focus, or in a hurry.

Why do I think this way?

I’ve proved that I can visit more than one site in a day, yet my mind still has this running list of reasons why I can’t give my all for the full day: I’ll be exhausted or too hot; my legs, feet, or back will hurt; time is short; or it’s time to start considering a hotel for the night (although why I have to start thinking that at noon when I don’t really want to check in until 3 p.m. doesn’t make sense). This recent trip added the need to “kill” time because I was in Missouri a day early. 

What exactly am I getting at here?

This is about how, as much as I attempt to be spontaneous and in-the-moment, my excess thinking distracts me from totally enjoying the moment. All those thoughts are in the back of my mind; of the need to be somewhere else at a particular time (even if it’s hours or days away. Heck, all that obsessive thinking exhausts me! In other words, it’s the “thinking” too much that drains my energy and creates unnecessary obstacles.

So, what’s the solution?

It all comes down to these words: Be fully in the moment! Not just physically, but mentally, too. I can’t be draining my energy thinking about what to do later. Yes, there is the necessary time to plan and the need to be aware of timelines and deadlines. However, if working on a project, visiting a site, or spending time with someone, I need to be totally in that moment. Yes, there are often limits, but those limits can be put aside and I should not let them weigh on my mind all the time. 

What have I accomplished here?

When I’m doing one thing, I can’t be thinking about the next… until it’s time to do that. For instance, when I visited the Lewis and Clark Historic Site and the Melvin Price Locks and Dam, I didn’t need to be thinking about the next place or finding a hotel later. I’d be looking at these fascinating displays, reading a piece of interesting history, or seeing a beautiful site and always in the back of my mind was the push to hurry on to the next thing. I can’t always use the excuse “I’ll come back and do it better some other time.” When I make a choice to do something, I need to do it without being distracted about later or feeling I should hurry.

My new motto: Take the time to enjoy the moment in the moment!